Ayy! You talkin' to me?

Umm, what is really going on here? Did my 'cyber milkshake' just get all the way turned up without my knowledge?!  I've been approached by 3 random guys on FB in less than a week.  I mean yeah, it's just FB, but still... Why don't guys come at me in REAL LIFE?!! :o/  The timing is kinda interesting, though, because while making my "30th Year Bucket List", one of my latest entries was to develop at least one good platonic friendship with a guy.  Just today, I watched a video claiming that it's dang near impossible, but I'm an idealist at heart (in a realistic kinda way). *shrug*

One that I met in a Christian group says he's saved, active in his church and re-committed to abstinence until marriage. He's apparently a couple inches shorter than I am but the convo has been great; and I'm getting the vibe that he kinda likes me. 

Another messaged me out of the clear blue, and says he's a business owner and former professional athlete. I didn't really tell him about myself after just one convo cuz I was too busy trying to get him to tell me why he decided to talk to me in the first place. I ended it in an 'open ended' fashion, so I'll see what happens if he decides to pick up where things left off.

The last one is connected to a Christian couple that I was in a small group with. But he just upped and sent me a friend request... Never seen him before in my life (or if I did, I just don't remember).

*sigh*  Welp, either way this should be interesting... And feel free to chime in.  I'd love to hear what you think.

stay blessed,

pVI

Lord, is that You??

I'm the kind of person that doesn't like to throw things to the winds of coincidence; I prefer to subscribe to the literal omnipotence of God.  So when I come in contact with a certain concept/experience several times within a certain period of time, I take it as a word from the Holy Spirit to my own.  For example, I would go to church and the sermon focused on a certain topic.  Then the same topic would come up randomly in a convo with someone who wasn't in church to hear the sermon.  Or, I would hear a related song on the radio or come across similar content online.  This happened in the months leading up to my first trip to Africa.  I would hear and see 'random' things related to my destination country to the point where I was convinced the planets had aligned to herald my pilgrimage to the Motherland. Something like that is what I've heard some call confirmation: essentially, God trying to get a certain point across by repeated exposure in any and all forms.

Interestingly enough, I've come across two particular instances of [what I would normally call] confirmation in the last 36 hours, all completely online:  intimacy and interracial relationships.  Yeah, I'm kinda freakin' out a little too...  The instances of intimacy started with a comment that I made on a friend's status on Facebook about intimacy being the foundation of God's intention for sex within marriage.  Shortly after, I stumble onto [yet another] new relationship advice web presence for single women--Finding Soulmate Success.  So, I'm perusing the site when the heading of a piece looked vaguely familiar... How to Restore Your Intimacy. *arf?* I didn't read the article but took a mental note, gave my computer the side-eye, and kept it moving.  Now, today, back on Facebook, another friend liked a post that made me do a double-take because it was highlighting what intimacy wasn't [sex] and was.  At this point, I'm wondering what the heck is really going on because right about now, I'm not in any relationship to apply said intimacy... unless you consider my relationship with Jesus.

Next up is the one that I found especially amusing.  In poking around the Finding Soulmate Success site, I decided to do the mandatory due diligence on its author, Ronn Elmore, PsyD.  One of his books caught my eye--How to Love a Black Man--so I did a web search on that.  Somehow, one of the results was a website devoted to interracial dating; specifically white men with black women... not sure how that happened but my interest was piqued so I looked around to see what people had to say.  I ended up reading comments about an interview with Robin Thicke on his relationship with Paula Patton.  After that, it was back over to--you guessed it--Facebook where things really got interesting.  One of my girlfriends posted about a movie she recently saw and liked, and tagged me in it.  Guess what it was about... Yup! A black woman falling in love with a white man... Starting to notice a pattern here?  *raised eyebrow*  So I message her asking why I was the only name she tagged and her response was fairly innocent.  But when I told her why I wanted to know, she joked with me that it was a sign that I needed to be more open-minded about finding my soulmate.  Well, I can honestly say that I've never dated a white man simply because, up to this point, one has never approached me.  (I was wrapped up with a bi-racial dude for a while... does that count?)  But real talk, aside from celebrity eye candy or a cute face on the street, there has never been a white guy that I have been genuinely attracted to like that.  Add my African heritage mindset plus my natural preference for 'dark chocolate' even among black men and I think you see where I'm going.  And then there's the socio-cultural disparity that would exist with me dating a white guy... I dunno if God is tryna give me a heads-up or what. 

Welp, at this point, I have anything but confirmation on the happenings above, but thanks for coming along with me for the crazy ride.  It will be interesting to see if anything significant comes of these... it it does, trust me when I say you'll hear it from me!  *sigh*  Never a dull moment...

be blessed,

pVI

Does forgiveness = friendship (on Facebook)?

Have you ever been bullied? I was, back in elementary school. Thank God Almighty that it wasn't physical but that whole "sticks and stones" bit was a straight-up LIE! Words did hurt me--to the point where I faked being sick so I could stay home and avoid the verbal thrashing that I knew was waiting for me just about every day. Being taunted and teased by the mean popular girls can do quite a number on a chubby adolescent girl's self-esteem. But it's only by God's grace that I can look back and say that those emotional scars contributed to making me the woman I am today: poised, outspoken, and yes, even confident.

Fast-forward several years to the present. One of the girls who picked on me has been sending me several friend requests on Facebook. I have absolutely NO idea why so I've ignored them without a second thought. Then recently, she sent me a private message mentioning that she tried to add me a couple of times but I must not have recognized her. *yeah, right* I responded to let her know that I knew who she was and I didn't add her because we were never friends. Yeah, if I see her in public, I would say "Hi" but that's pretty much all I have to say. We never reconciled; she never apologized and I let her know that even though I forgave her for that, we should keep our distance online. But because of a mandate of forgiveness from the lips of Jesus Christ himself, I can honestly say that I no longer hold hate in my heart towards her; or anyone else that used to make my life a [literal] living hell.

However,

This situation makes me stop and ask "Am I obligated to 'friend-up' with this person on Facebook as a demonstration of my forgiveness?" Normally, I would turn to the Bible for help but things get really difficult when there's no entry for social networking in the index. So, that leaves me to read between the lines and look for overarching principles that would apply to my situation. Sounds simple enough, right? Ummm, naw.

*sigh* It's late and I need to get to bed but that's no excuse for procrastinating about seeking the answer to something that may have an impact on my Christian walk--or even on bringing another person to Christ. I'm gonna let this one simmer for a while before I clear my mind enough to objectively dig into the Word for an answer. Shoo, I might even start a series of posts: What the Bible Says About Facebook--nothing! LOL But due diligence is a must 'cause Lord knows Facebook keeps my Christianity interesting... and then some.

be blessed,

pVI

Sooo, my 'ex' is now my 'friend' on Facebook O_o

*semi-rant*

How did this happen?! Oh yeah, a long time ago before he joined FB, invites were inadvertently sent out to all my email contacts. Apparently, he signed up today--I know, right? After all this time--and accepted my friend request. I'm still tryna figure out how to feel about that.

I swore up and down that he was 'the one'. I still remember the flutters in my stomach and the goofy smile on my face when I told him I love you for the first time; just like it was yesterday. Apparently, God knew better... He and I were out of touch for a few years and I actually liked it like that because it meant less opportunity for me to watch re-runs of our relationship with my mind's eye. Now, out of the blue *BAM* right in my face. I literally felt the air get sucked out of my lungs when I read the notification that he accepted my friend request.

*sigh* I give up, Lord--this is all just a bit much.